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    I think you should argue the case for a compromise with your husband—there’s no reason you can’t take a weeklong trip somewhere exciting together while also planning a backpacking excursion with some friends for a three- or four-day weekend for yourself later on. I had many boyfriends during the past years but never had sex with any of them—not because I wasn’t ready, but because it just didn’t happen.

    Last summer I met someone, and we went on several dates but at the end had an on-and-off friends-with-benefits relationship.

    He said he’d like to try that, but he wouldn’t be willing to use one of his vacation weeks, and he’d like to do a more elaborate trip with his vacation time.

    I then asked if he would be all right with me going backpacking with some friends instead, since I am a teacher and have all summer off and plenty of time to do it all.

    How can I work toward letting this go before it ruins what we have?I have been experiencing envy in a way that is detrimental to our relationship.She is young, been working here for four years, and has seen a promotion and outrageous raise every year she has been here.Right now I feel ready to have sex with him, but since it’s my first time and since he’s not my boyfriend, I’m scared I’m going to regret it when I get older.I really want to have sex; not because everyone is doing it—or else I would’ve done it a long time ago—I just can’t stop thinking about it and feel more than ready.

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